Okay, this is going to sound bad, and it IS bad, but I'm sorta pissed at one of the sweet little girls in AD's daycare class. It sucks because this little girl is so cute, and has the cutest name (Mia), and is one of AD's favorite playmates, AND she's a Fake Hispanic too! They are destined to be BFFs! Which is why it's truly unfortunate that I am forced to hate her. BUT I AM.
Here's the deal. Everyone knows that the best part of retrieving your toddler from daycare or playgroup or the grandparents' house or whatev is the moment your kid first sees you. And their eyes light up with recognition, and maybe they even screech "MAMA!", and toss aside whatever they are playing with to run over, really pumping the arms and everything which is OMG so funny. Am I right? And you really look forward to this moment in your day, and appreciate it as one of the best parts of parenting, and time stops and a spotlight shines on you and your perfect child like on that Charlie Brown Christmas Special, and there's a cheesy soundtrack and BLAH DE BLAH. Back to the hating of innocents!
Anyway, this little girl is ruining my life! She has taken to posting herself at the window of the classroom during the general "picking up" time and announcing the arrival of each parent as soon as they've turned the corner into the hallway! I can hear her screeching "AD! Mommy! AD! Mommy!"(she actually does say "AD", for boring slash weird reasons related to what they call AD at daycare)(not "AD", in case you were worried)(GOD, I hate people who use initials as pseudonyms, i.e. MYSELF). At any rate, by the time I get there, AD is already at the door, ready to go! And I have been robbed of the element of surprise, as well as the pleasure slash horror of seeing her hipcheck all of the other kids into the boards as she frantically makes her way toward me! BOO!
I mean, it's SORT OF cute, and actually pretty impressive that this little girl recognizes me as AD's mom, and clearly she won't be needing the lasah anytime soon, good LORD, but still. COME ON KID! You are seriously harshing my buzz here! COOL IT, Paul Revere!
P.S.-Can we just accept that this post has some heinous pronoun-antecedent agreement issues and move on? Excellent. (Did I just say ANTECEDENT?)(Or do I mean SUBJECT-VERB agreement?)(Jesus H. Hole. Getting. Bigger.)
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39 comments:
PAUL REVERE! HA!
There are a bunch of little fuckers in Ducky's class that I hate, too.
Although, I think that my daughter would be Mia in this scenario. She's mouthy.
I agree--that is the BEST part of the day. I think you should insist that the other girl be removed from AD's classroom. She's totally stealing your thunder.
Totally down for "hating on the innocents!"
I have this SAME problem but it's her teacher. I KNOW she can't wait to get rid of each little shit and she probably does an internal happy dance as each one walks out but I like to watch them through the window for a few minutes and she always yells out "SKYLLLLEEEEER Mommy's here" and ruins it. GAH!
Oh, too sweet and funny. The little arm pumping has really set the mood for my entire day. LIttle arms! Pumping!
I can understand why you are hating on Mia; just the imaginary AD pumping her arms has improved MY day.
Funny - for the past couple of weeks I've been really hating the initials as pseudonyms thing on my site but am wondering if it will be weird and similar to throwing an unnecessary wrench in the system if I suddenly change to pseudonymous names? And then - WHAT NAMES TO CHOOSE?!?! Thoughts?
Okay, there needs to be some serious reorganization of activity time so that all the kids are thoroughly distracted at the end of the day when the parents are arriving. Or else a set of very heavy curtains. Who cares if the kids look like ghosts because they never see the sun? They'll be very cute, arm-pumping ghosts, and that's what matters.
Mia = The Next Gladys Kravitz (do you remember her from Bewitched???)
I think your hating her is only preparing her for what's to come. No one likes the know-it-all rubber-neck neighbor.
Artemisia, I am struggling with the exact same thing. I would REALLY like to change to pseudonym NAMES instead of those blasted initials, which I am SO OVER.
Actually, what I REALLY want to do is use our REAL NAMES, but there's always a chance BR will take an interest in the blog, and that Would Not Stand. He already thinks this thing is shady enough with all of you predatahs.
Could you maybe put a finger to your lips (and a twinkle in your eye, GAH) and get this little Ed McMahon on your side? Sort of "in on the surprise" type of thing?
Idk. My kids are teens and they are SO over being thrilled to see me. And I'm even less thrilled to see them. MOVE OUT, ALREADY.
Eh. At my son's age (almost 4), he is so busy when I get there...If he doesn't see me first, one of the other kids announces my presence, which I don't mind, and then he glances up briefly and waits for me to come check out what he's doing.
My little HR (LOOK! A CLUE!) is 7 and I still get the "HOLLY! Your MOM's HERE!" shit. And then Holly says, "Ah, dang!" because she never wants to leave her afterschool program so she sucks worse than AD because at least AD is nominally interested in seeing you, even if she doesn't do the arm-pumping thing.
i'm totally down with hating of innocents. and i actually DO hate puppies, sometimes. (i mean seriously! with the peeing and crapping all over the place, and the yapping and jumping? GAH. OVER IT.) so.. uh.. sign me up.
I have hated SO MANY kids in my time. I even hate one RIGHT NOW. Maybe "hate" is a little strong, but "am supremely annoyed by" or "grates on MY LAST NERVE" is too long-winded.
Also, I've been thinking the same thing about initials PARTICULARLY because I use a SINGLE initial for all my kids except one. The two initials thing works better. I'm having trouble completely re-naming my kids, though. I suppose I could just use middle names as Swistle does with her kids. That's probably what I'll do, just because it's easy and then I won't have to come up with totally new names. ALTERNATIVELY, I could have a NAME MY KIDS contest. Post pictures and let you guys name them. Yes, I believe that would be fun.
"COOL IT, Paul Revere!" HAHAHA!!!! I love it! Yes, this is totally the best part of the day. (Mine aren't in daycare, but when I come home, Wildman comes running to the door, yelling "Mama"!) I would smack anyone who ruined it. Of whatever age. And I would be down with you changing psuedonymns on your blog to anything you prefer. Change is good.
You are right, it is an awesome sound to hear them scream that! What I hate is when I have come home and SD is all excited to see me but then starts crying when Nana leaves, makes me feel great!
It totally sucks that Paul Revere is killing that experience! My son is only 5 but when he was about 3.5 or 4 he stopped running to meet me at the day care door. Now I get a "Mommy!" and then he goes back to doing whatever. Of course sometimes I get "I don't want to go home!" I guess I'm glad he enjoys daycare, but damn kid, would it kill you to show me some love (answer = yes, sigh). ANYWAY, the point is, the running to meet mommy with joy thing doesn't last forever and Paul Revere is killing it - the hate is totally justified.
Other people's kids suck sometimes. Maybe you should threaten her with bodily harm through the window and scare her off... But then, how well does the teacher know you - if you can't deny, this is not a plausible solution.
my favorite part is my kid running over to me and telling me all about whatever he is doing because he is always so pumped to show me. So I hate the kid who comes over and has to tell me who is picking him up and that he has new shoes and about what he had for dinner last night. THere is a little girl that does it too and they are both starting to DRIVE ME NUTS. seriously kids - let me talk to MY child. he's the one I LIKE
I love this part of the day as well and would feel robbed of the entertainment. However at one point my son would just run the OTHER way when we arrived and I was like AH honey Mommy's here?! All sad and pathetic and he would hide. Yeah so there's that too.
This totally calls for some sort of elaborate disguise.
There's an idea. I should get a CHICKEN SUIT or something.
No, not a chicken suit a Freddy Krueger mask - scare the shit out of the little fun killer. Bet she stays away from the window after that! lmao!
Freddy Krueger! Chicken Suit! HAH!!! I love this post. Seriuosly though I say we take her out.
I never thought about it, but yes, I like the element of surprise bit. Maybe you should go in disguise for a few days - hat, mustash, dark sunglasses. Although possibly you would be mistaken for a child kidnapper, so maybe not.
Yeah, the other parents would LOVE THAT. I'll just roll up as CHESTER THE MOLESTER. Heh.
You know, I find that I don't really like kids other than my own period. Maddie doesn't even go to daycare.
Poor Mia... I wonder if she will spend her life as a "that person" that is ALWAYS the buzz killer?
Same thing when William was in preschool: another child would yell it, and so I missed the light-up. CRABBY.
I snorted a little at "COOL IT, Paul Revere!" Carry on.
so I'm reading this post keep thinking "allright when is she going to get to the part about the puppies??" DUH!
Yeah I can imagine wanting to knock some little urchin down. They talk too much for their own good. There's nothing I cant' stand more than someone's little brat standing there loudly stating the obvious.
that child is a total buzz kill. just today, i was tickled at picking up my little one and seeing her run as fast as her little legs could take her, grinning from ear to ear.
this is especially significant as this is the 3rd week in daycare and this has been the turning point week..she likes it :)
that child is a total buzz kill. just today, i was tickled at picking up my little one and seeing her run as fast as her little legs could take her, grinning from ear to ear.
this is especially significant as this is the 3rd week in daycare and this has been the turning point week..she likes it :)
YOU SLAY ME!
I know someone who can "take care of" this little kid for you...
LOL. Sounds so ominous. LOL.
You are so funny Tessie! My kids are only 5 and 3 and stopped being excited to see me a long time ago - "oh, it's just mom! I want to stay and play here where it's not boring! Whah!" blah
Can you try to sneak in? Or show up a few mins early for a few days? Maybe that will throw off the little borderguard.
I dunno, I am still diggin the chicken costume at this point.
I just had a birthday party for my daughter where I fell in hate with her three best friends. These little princesses 1) didn't like lazer tag. 2) didn't like pizza or the flavor cake we provided. 3) didn't want to participate in the activities when the staff was having them. So they followed me around asking me for money so they could play the arcade games instead.
I was like, "I'm paying $500 for this party, bitches in training, so I don't fucking think so."
Tessie, doesn't she (Mia) know not to "mess with Texas?" GAH! (Sorry, I having stolen your GAH!) I love your blog girl. You crack me up! Ah, kids!
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