Here's the thing: I'm the Lazy Parent, and the Lazy Parent is almost never the Fun Parent.
I make fun of myself a lot for being lazy, but the truth is I sort of like that about myself. For some reason, the word "lazy" has a negative connotation, and I don't really understand why.
For example, this weekend we were at the mall shopping, and we (BR) got sucked in by one of those kiosk dudes trying to sell manicure kits. I (grudgingly) allowed him to use the little buffer deal on my nails, and then he offered to let me try it. Since I am not the Rude Parent (I won't say who is, you do the math), I humored the guy with a few half-assed swipes. He admonished me with a finger wag and a "You're so LAZY! Do it like THIS!", which of course caused BR to cackle madly. On the way home, he was reliving the glory of having my laziness pointed out. My response? You're right. I am lazy. ABOUT SHIT THAT DOESN'T MATTER. Now call me crazy, but I think of this as A Good Thing. It's EFFICIENT and even SMART.
I am not one of those people who is cranked up to ELEVEN at all times. I can count on one hand the number of times in my life I've been cranked up to even an eight or nine (although I am one of those irritating people who sometimes pretends to be cranked up for comedic effect). Because the truth is that MOST SHIT DOESN'T MATTER. And seriously, not to go all "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" on you, but in my adult life (and especially as a parent), I have found that this is the Minority View.
If there are any Git-R-Done types reading, allow me to usher you over to the Dark Side: I am a parent! I work full-time outside the home in what many people consider a demanding profession! I read at least 50 books a year! I watch a shitload of TV! I exercise regularly! I read and comment on an embarassing number of blogs! I cook for my family! And I spend pretty much all of my non-work hours with my husband and daughter! And how do I do all this while maintaining my characteristic Sunny Disposition (Shut. Up.)? BY BEING "LAZY", THAT'S HOW! Laziness! It works! Quit trying to do so much shit!
I need a goddamn infomercial. I am the next Tony Robbins.
13 comments:
Amen! I, too, am The Lazy Parent and I like it that way. Critics just need to remember that Lazy does not necessarily equal Neglectful and Selfish. :)
I don't think you sound lazy, I just think you sound like you've got a good attitude and don't carry around useless amounts of anxiety over things that may not matter all that much, or over which you have no control anyway. I think it's a sign of mental health.
Flibberty-I like it! Let's go with that!
I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm mentally healthy, though. Hehe.
I would totally buy your 10-cassette series, your shiny new book, and your branded workout equipment.
You are me. :) Only I call it the apathetic parent or the "Who cares?" parent. But like you said, about stuff that really doesn't matter.
I'm also the "what's the worst thing that could happen?" parent. You know, like when your horror-stricken husband says, "Why are you letting the baby chew on the cell phone?" and you answer, "Because when she's chewing on the cell phone, she's not crying. Besides, what's the worst thing that could happen? She shorts out the phone with her drool? Big deal, no one calls me anyway. I'm getting more value out of it as a chew toy."
Amen sista! I love it! I totally get freaked by these kinds of people...(http://www.aboutourkids.org/aboutour/articles/hyperparenting.html)
I mean isn't this working parent gig hard enough (see my blog about our lovely weekend...) - who in the world needs the added stress?!
Ok, I totally want to plagiarize your last paragraph and give it to my husband. that is me in a nutshell!! (Especially the TV )
jmc-me too on the "who cares" parenting. It's like with the box of kleenex thing..."she'll take out the whole box and eat half of them!" AND THEN...what? Anarchy?
I heart your last paragraph, too. Go on the road with this and you'll make a ton!
I love it! I never understood the people who freak the hell out over things that literally do not matter.
I'm lazy, too. I'd say that we should start a revolution or something, but it sounds like too much work.
Kleenex eating: Worst that could happen - you might have to break out the prune juice. On the other hand, they may be chock full o' fiber, in which case, maybe we all should be eating them. :)
I hope the Fun Parent had to be the bath parent.
Also, thanks for providing ways for me to embrace my laziness. Now if I can just convince the hubby...
Damn girl! I wish I could get me some of that. Because I am unfortunately *always* cranked up to at least a 9 and if you ever meet my mother, you'll know why. I work full time outside the home and can't manage to exercise or cook! Yea me!
Except when it comes to my child, I'm pretty much like "whatever makes her happy as long as she's not on fire." So does that make me lazy too? Please pretty please?!?
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