*While I (inexplicably) don't mind the Leggings Phenomenon, I'm afraid I still cannot stomach skinny jeans, even while holding my nose. It is just TOO SOON, ya know? I'm not ready.
*We took the STAIRS to the top of the Eiffel Tower, while carrying two days' worth of luggage on our decidedly non-packmulish backs. THANK YOU STAIRMASTER!
*A couple I was friends with in college got engaged at the top of the Eiffel Tower. She was on vacation with her family, and he showed up (in Paris! At the top of the Eiffel effing Tower!) to surprise her. To this day, it's probably the best engagement story I've ever heard.
*Turns out I require upwards of a QUARTER-CUP of mayonnaise to properly consume an order of "frites" at a Belgian restaurant.
*I am utterly unable to master the mechanics of chopsticks, even under threat of certain humiliation and before my first glass of wine. I just...HOW? And why does it look SO EASY? Am I...*gasp* TRYING TOO HARD slash OVERTHINKING? Surely not. That would be most unlike me. AND YET.
*The British make liberal use of the word "fuck", and I don't think I have to tell you how well this suits me. I sigh happily even now just thinking of it. My favorite usage by far is, "OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!". Hee!
*If you are short, you may as well skip the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace. I'm just sayin. You will be able to watch it in the viewing panes of other people's cameras, and...that's about it.
*The only souvenir I regret not buying is a pink "This is my dance space" tank top from the Dirty Dancing musical we saw in London (OMG IT WAS SO GOOD I LOVED IT SO MUCH).
*In all my life, I have never known anyone as generous and fun-loving as my friend Woz. I wish for all of you to have the type of friend who would book you a plane ticket to London (also: PARIS!) on a moment's notice, based only on your shitty day and a desire to drink with you in person. Woz puts people before money every. single. time, and that's just one of the many things I lurve about her (also: the fact that neither of us will ever, EVER be president due to a wide variety of shenanigans).
Thanks, man. You always know just what to do.
48 comments:
Glad you had fun! And that you're back, 'cause we missed you! I also love the "Oh, for fuck's sake," every time I hear it in a British movie.
Sweet! Sounds like you had an awesome trip, I am very jealous. For I love Paris more than anywhere in the world. Glad you had a good time!!
"Oh, for fuck's sake" is poetry, is it not? I totally picked it up while living in England. That, and "loads" rather than "tons." It was loads of fun!
So glad you had a great time!
I think Oh for fuck's sake will be my new favorite saying. Love it!
I am so glad you had a good time. Also, competely and totally jealous. Of the trip. Of the friendship. Of actually knowing the people in the engagement story.
Totally.
THIS EXPLAINS WHY TORSTEN SWEARS SO MUCH. I could never figure it out, but you're RIGHT. It's because he lived in LONDON for three years. DAMN THEM.
Glad you had such a good time! And glad you're back!
This post makes me want to give both you and Woz a big hug. I have warm fuzzy feelings!
Europeans have always and will always love tight pants, thus the skinny jeans.
yay! i'm glad you had such a good time, and i'm (selfishly) glad you're back, and i'm super glad you have a woz. that's fantastic all around.
i also like "fucking hell!!" which my friends and i thought was "fucking L" for quite some time. You know how americans will say "fucking A!"? We thought our friends were just saying "fucking L!" ...uh, until we realized we were morons, anyway.
Great posts from you Lame ASS American. Hate to tell you this, but you are starting to look like yourself in all your fucking pictures. Must be the Divorce Status. Maybe Divorce Status will be like your drivers license and have the same picture on it for years (like the same weight for fourteen years) and you will never change or age.
Missed you, glad you are back. Desperately Seeking a Laugh: Tessie Style.
I SO need a friend like that.
Glad you had a good time! How did AD do while you were gone?
It's fucking brilliant that you're back! I've missed you(r blog) ever so much. Off to the pub for banger's and mash!
*Please read the above with a terrible Eliza Doolittle accent.
It sounds like a perfect time. Thanks for telling us about it!
I am SO not on board with the skinny jeans thing either. Like my ass needs to look bigger than it already is! You could probably rock them, though!
Welcome back! Sounds like you had a great time. I did Paris on my post-university backpacking extravaganza, so my pathetic, wrinkle-proof, worn several times before washing, Canadian wardrobe was even more pathetic beside the fabulous European styles.
A lot of people 'round these parts say "for fuck's sake"; we have a little more British influence here I guess.
i love my skinny jeans. i resisted the urge for a LONG time, but now, i love 'em. but ONLY with boots.
Agreeing with lorid - "For fuck's sake" is totally a Canadian thing too! Also - I totally have a Dirty Dancing t-shirt from the musical that says "I brought a ...watermelon?!" - so great!
So glad you had such a fun time! And seriously, how could NOT get that tank top???? I may have to do an internet search now to find one for myself!
And chopsticks...right there with you...can't do them, don't even try anymore!
YAY! You're back!
Also, how can I become friends with this Woz character? She sounds awesome.
I'm glad you had fun and I can't wait to hear all the stories.
Oh, For Fuck's Sake is my favorite too! I even use the PG version in front of my neice - Oh, for f's sake.... not quite the same.
Skinny jeans = look like a triangle from the waist down. Not cute! And yet so persistent!
Sounds like an awesome trip. Note to self: find a friend like Woz.
YEA!!! You're back!! So glad you had a good time!!
For fuck's sake, I am totally envious of you!
Ever since watching an Eddie Izzard stand up routine I say "Oh, for fuck's sake" all. the. time. And I'm from Minnesota.
I missed you. Glad your trip was fabulous.
Woz is making me weep, or maybe it's just that I'm so glad you're back! Also: Woz needs a blog.
FINALLY - a nation where you and I can speak freely. That's FUCKING AWESOME!
Ok, when I read the "for fuck's sake" I totally heard it in my mind as Woz's voice!
I am so glad you got to go!!!
Oh my God, two posts in one day! After such a drought?! Yay! That engagement story is terrific. Your trip sounds wonderful and Woz sounds like a great friend. She must be cloned immediately. : )
Okay, is it just the perspective on that photo, or do those wine glasses look the size of punchbowls?
What a great time! Glad you went! Glad you're back!
You look exceedingly happy in those photos (possibly drunk?) - so glad for you that you were able to get away with a great friend and get perspective.
Next time, I want to go too For Fuck's Sake!
Oh how they love their skinny jeans here. I don't get it. They look so bloody uncomfortable.
As for "fuck's sake", my husband (British) was reading a book written by an American about the UK tonight. He mentioned that the author had never heard that expression before, and I had no idea Americans wouldn't be familiar with it. I didn't even leave the US that long ago and apparently I've forgotten what is British, and what is American.
Say what you want about England and your trip, but I beg of you not to mention the Brits' teeth. It's the American fallback.
Oh Tessie! I am so jealous yet so happy for you. London is my absolute favorite city in the whole world (I think I already told you that). I am glad you had such a well deserved good time. Welcome back!
I'm glad you have a friend like that, she sounds amazing! The chopsticks thing I've always held in my head as a last resort diet. I'm unskilled with them as well and figure I'd loose a ton of weight if anyone ever took away my silverware and gave me two pieces of wood instead.
The two things on my mind lately are the Olympics and Karma. Oh, and Dogma. As in my Dogma got run over by my, well, you know. Anyway, looks like the karma scales are tipping back to your side. And THAT is a good thing.
We in Canad have much mroe Brit influence, obvs, because 'for fuck's sake' has been a regular in my vocab for YEARS! It doesn't hurt that my best friend is Brit, and her mom totally rocks the curse words. So happy you're back, for fuck's sake!!
I was gone while you were gone! How PERFECT. I missed nothing! Hooray!
(So glad you're back and that this did not work out differently. SO GLAD.)
What a great friend!
Oh, and I MUST see Dirty Dancing, the musical. Please tell me it's coming stateside?!?!?
I always thought 'for fuck's sake' was an Aussie thing. I'm kind of disappointed to hear we got it from the Brits.
Tessie, so glad you had a great time. You needed a relaxed vacay to give you a break from all the nervous-tummy tension that is the Divorce Happening.
I love "for fuck's sake" but I'm quite fond of how they rip off a quick "Piss off!", too. What's freaky is you will hear little kids say it...
Welcome back! Glad to hear you had a good time.
My favorite British thing to hear is little kids asking if they "can have a go at it."
I, too, was wondering about those wine glasses/punch bowls.
What a wonderful friend in Woz you have!
Oh for fuck's sake! are you trying to make me cry??? I'm getting soft in my old age, ya know?
I had an absolute blast with you here and I was so sad when you left. I hope we get a chance to do it again! You are THE BEST!!!
P.S. That picture was taken the night of Tessie's 30th birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TESSIE!!!
For fuck's sake, I was wondering where you were!! LOL. I love the word fuck. I guess I need to go to London.
You have the best.friend.ever. to take you to London on a whim. so jealous!!!!
happy birthday?
Skinny jeans? HAHAHAHHAHAHHA. My calves laugh at skinny jeans.
Looks like you had a blast. Did you "mind the gap"?
And you look the same as some of the other photos you've posted recently. Hrumph. Now I have nothing to make fun of you about.
Welcome back! Glad you had a good time.
I just can't stomach skinny jeans. bleh!!
That's great you had a good trip! I am also just charmed with the liberal sprinklings of fuckosity in Brit conversation. And I was also struck by the leggings, but I was rather dismayed by the extensive wearing of Uggs. It was like they were stuck in 2002.
I do not understand skinny jeans. But that is probably because I have a huge ass and hips and they do NOT look good on me.
I need this Woz as a friend.
I had to comment b/c WE climbed the stairs to the Eiffel Towwer and it is not as easy as I thought it would be. Holy shit I thought my legs were going to fall off.
And when I was in Paris back in February, I was also the only person without skinny jeans on and I have two reasons why I can't do it. 1.) I don't think it's a good look and 2.) I'm NOT skinny. Ugh.
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