Well, damn, forget I asked about the name Linus. I'm getting a distinct hell-to-the-no vibe from the majority of you. And thanks to My Buddy Mimi's comment, which informed me that the German pronunciation is in fact LEAN-us (AS IN PEN1S), I'm reluctantly Holstering Linus for Ethical Reasons. We can't have any Linus the Pinus running around here.
Anyway, I'm acting like I have a baby to name here. I don't. My incumbent baby already has a name, and it looks like we sure as hell won't be changing it to Linus. Also, I'm not pregnant or anything (OR AM I?) (I'm not) (THAT YOU KNOW OF) (Ok I'll stop), so this is all just a Pleasant (or Excruciating, depending upon the reader) Diversion.
Also, we probably wouldn't have been using Linus anyway, because *MESSING WITH TEXAS EXCLUSIVE* we have a Hispanic last name. And, I don't want to sound like a total dick here, because I actually really like our last name, but it sort of harshes my baby-naming buzz. There are only so many things that "go" with a name that is distinctly ethnic, like "Diaz" (not our last name, but you get the idea). Linus Diaz sounds Fucking Ridiculous. On the other hand, we don't want to go all "Viva Puerto Rico!" either, because...out of the three Diazes in our household, exactly ZERO of us appears to be anything more than your average Whitey.
The best thing about having a Hispanic last name, though, is that we're constantly the beneficiaries of racial profiling in advertising. We get all the English AND Spanish language Target coupons (although we can't read them; none of us read or speak Spanish), and we also get the Spanish grocery fliers and magazines and what-not. Also, there's the cheap thrill that BR gets when he shows up for an interview and sees the little frowny-face from the affirmative action panel. An Instant Classic.
Mr. and Mrs. Diaz
Also, Inaugural Appearance of BR. He's a Regulation Hottie, if not Clearly Hispanic, eh?
48 comments:
Definitely on the hot side. :)
Total hottie couple!
We have a "flashy" last name that, given the wrong first name could make our kids sound like porn stars. For example, names like Tiffany, Crystal and Dirk are not options for us. Not that we're naming a baby EVER again (or are we? no, we're not.)
Lori-Is it "Diggler"? OH PLEASE LET IT BE DIGGLER.
No - but you're surprisingly close.
Okay can I just say you are from MN and your last name is Diaz... why doesnt anyone else find that amusing? I know you married into it but I find it funny mostly because well most of the people I know from MN were Olsen (or Olson) or Sven or something along that line. Seriously. I knew an Olsen and Sven.
I totally obesses over baby names even though we are not even sure about #2. I think it just comes with having too much time on my hands to think about it. Also, last name Schmidt so not many go with that either (or not many that I like go with it... Schmidt = Smith to me...)
Biggler.
I snort more on this blog than any other (compliment). Moment of silence for for Linus's shortlived tenure. It's a nice name, but I agree with your logic. I think Lori should get it. Linus Diggler has a nice ring to it.
Also, I'm not pregnant or anything (OR AM I?) (I'm not) (THAT YOU KNOW OF)
I've looked before and again just now, but Eddie Izzard's "Engelbert Humperdinck" routine isn't on YouTube or anywhere else I can find. So you need to go get Izzard's Dress to Kill concert. Skip the intro and get right to the show. Trust me, you will love it.
WTOW-I know SO many Olsens and Andersens and what-not.
And, SIGH. I KNOW on the Hispanic last name. The waters are muddied even further by the fact that we live in TEXAS, where there are many Real Hispanics (not that we are Fake Hispanics, but you know).
This is an ironic blog today because last night I totally had a dream that YOU WERE KNOCKED UP!!! True Story.
Hot? Yes!
And if you fall in love with a name that doesn't go with the last name, you could always go crazy and use your original last name. That's what we did. Of course, it is my last name. And Josh decided it because he didn't want a girl to have to have a last name that is basically HeMan. Then again his mom barely speaks to me because I'm the feminist devil who must be at fault. Rambling...
That photo MADE MY DAY. The hotness! My god.
Also, Torsten has a distinctly German last name, which does limit our options somewhat. But even though we most definitely do not have a baby to name, I like nothing more than going over name after name with him, until he makes me stop because I'm stressing him out.
Anon-You know, I haven't ever seen that concert, even though I know it's some kind of Internet Legend. I'm not really as cool as I appear on this here blog *SNORT*
Slim-Well, as long as it wasn't G-Dogg who dreamt it, I'll feel safe
Crystal-You wouldn't say that if you knew my maiden name. It's...well, it's Unfortunate and Clunky.
Anon - I love thae Engelbert Humperdink skit. "Slap VanWalla. Engelbert Slaptyback." Eddie Izzard rocks in every conceivable way.
Tessie, BR is quite the hottie. For a Fake Mexican and all.
I am totally calling your next kid Linus the Pinus no matter what you name him/her.
Dear Mrs. Mencia:
Are you the person in the barfing picture on the right, because you that charming picture does not look to be the same person as the tiny elfin woman in the couples picture with Carlos. Please advise.
Sincerely, Jane
Jane-HA! MRS. MENCIA! Also, yes, they're both me. The photo with Carlos has the fortunate effect of camouflaging my pointy beak.
Also, if you didn't know I was elfin, then, as you would say, YOU ARE A TOTAL SKIMMER!
I actually do (did) speak fluent spanish. And I am so white, I could be your wacky neighbor.
About 10 years ago I entered a contest for Yankee Tickets from the Spanish speaking newspaper.
I STILL GET JUNK MAIL IN SPANISH!!
Even with my fake Irish married name (my FIL is from Scotland, yo, and don't forget it)
2 years ago, as a joke, my husband filled out the free offer for Latina magazine.
The mail quadrupled.
In retaliation, on his 30th birthday, I signed him up for AARP.
And certainly not least, my god, your husband is HOT.
I am not a SKIMMER, I am a NEW READER who doesn't have time to go back and read everything from day one! Uh, unless you've only been blogging for a week, which I don't know, and I'm not going back to look now just on principle.
Jane-Wait! Don't go! I was just composing my new masthead "Messing With Texas: Sporadically Read By Plain-Jane!"
You guys are a cute couple!
It's too bad that certain last names limit baby name choices. Jason's last name is one syllable, so unless I want my kid to sound like a detective from the 20s, we'll have to have a two-syllable first name.
Also, certain names are off-limits due to the unintentional hilarity they would cause by said last name. (Chip, for example.)
P&D-Is it "Dip"? PLEASE LET IT BE DIP.
"Dip?" OMG, that was priceless!!
Sadly, my soon-to-be last name is not Dip.
Chip Dip and Dirk Diggler, I am laughing out loud!
You have the best readers!
& now you're going to piss Jane off and she's never going to read your fake Hispanic blog again.
BTW, you and your hubby are some kind of cuteness together. You could totally be the fake photo that comes in picture frames.
I think P&D is named Wood. Here's how we can tell...Hey, P&D? Is "Harry" out? What about "Pat?" HAHA I like this game!!
If P&D is going to be a Wood, then Chuck is definitely out, too.
Jane,
Actually, Harry IS out. :) And you're very close with Wood; just think of the different forms wood can take...
You guys should all be glad my ex and I never had kids. His last name was Lester and I wanted to name any future children Polly or Moe.
Yeah, but isn't Harry out for other reasons as well? No offense to anyone who names their kid Harry, but it's sort of an automatic asking to be made fun of, isn't it?
I can't think of anything except "Dick" and if so, then I DEMAND you name your child Harry. For the good of society.
HARRY IS OUT? Oh, this is the best day of my life. I am wracking my brain. WRACKING I SAY!
Too bad about Lester. Chester the Molester was my favorite Garbage Pail Kid.
I actually went to high school with a guy whose last name was Dick. I won't embarrass him by listing his first name, but it was a very nice, respectable name.
Not that it helped him at all.
Okay, wood can be a board, a plank, a block. If you burn it, it will be ash. Types of trees include oak, maple, elm, ash again, pine, cyprus, cedar, Christmas ;). This might make me crazy. Stump, log, stick, twig.
Or when you say forms of Wood, do you mean like Woodward, Woody, Woodley, Woodcock perhaps? Harry Woodcock...
It's one syllable, so "Woodcock" is out, to my great dismay. Stick? Cane? Chip Stick sounds awesome, but I've never known anyone named Stick. Chip Cane sounds like a porn star. JUST TELL US ALREADY.
Jane,
I fear I've said too much.
Oh, forgot the one syllable thing. Damn. I'm stuck.
OMG, y'all are crazy!
And I mean that in the best possible way, of course.
Whoo. Your husband is...um. WHOO. Nice-looking. *fans face*
The Swistle household also deals with an ethnic last name. I LOVVVVVVE French-sounding names, and they sound SO NUTS with our last name. But I hate the names that are the ethnicity of our last name. So we're stuck. Simpler names sound better.
"Average Whitey"--ha ha ha!
P&D - Board. Is it Board? Not as good as Chip Dip. But Chip Board works. No? I fear I've had too much wine.
Also, you guys are way better with forms of wood than I am. I was like, "Hm...forms of wood...PAPER! Yeah! ...That's all I've got."
I really can't say anything more, because you guys are getting *way* too close.
I actually liked Linus. Wouldn't name my own kid that, but it has a certain cute factor about it.
These comments are cracking me up! What fun. My husband thinks I'm crazy laughing at my little blogs. Little does he know...
Your husband is gor-juss (note the Jersey accent) Wanna trade?
I see the pinus-linus problem, but I still like the name Linus. I named our dog that, and then I wished I hadn't because I liked it for a child. But the dog and the child cannot share the same name. I have standards, you know?
Oh Shauna. And right before your wedding too, now we won't be able to focus on any of the details but will instead be scouring your entries for HINTS HINTS.
And Erin-too bad about your dog. We named one of our dogs Sasha, which is a name I like too. Smooth.
The boy's name I've ALWAYS dreamed of using is the name my MIL named her cat. The one that pees on their furniture and other belongings constantly. Also, the one who scratched me so badly it gave me crazy pre-cancerous scar tissue I had to get taken off. Lame.
I actually like the name Linus, though it does bring to mind images of Charlie Brown. So don't feel like you're alone in your craziness.
I have a nephew who's first name is Charles and middle name is Brown. And yes, we call him Charlie. But it's rather endearing, I think. Also? By the time he gets to school, none of the kids are even gonna know who Charlie Brown is, which is a shame.
Linus is a cute name but no, you're right, it does not go well with Diaz. But what about Lionel? That was a particular fave of mine, cast aside because it didn't go well with our last name. Lionel.... nice ring to it huh?
We looooove the name Sasha for a girl, but we're afraid it's too close to Shauna. And the name we really like for a boy? Jenson.
So we'd be: Shauna, Sasha, Jason & Jenson.
LAME.
Shauna-HAHAHAHAHA!
Also, I mourn the loss of the name "Jesse" for a boy. I LOVE IT, but it is too close to my name. Plus, this is what people always THINK I say when I say my name is Tessie. In fact, about 50% of my mail is addressed to "Jessie Diaz"
how come some gils ge all the luck? And why are all the good men already taken?
Post a Comment